I'm Actually Not
Ugh, what a boring start to what promises to be a lame week. Nothing of interest over on Missed Connections, the only item in entertainment news is O.J.'s book being pulled (big fucking surprise), Diablo's contemplating dying her pubic hair pink (actually not a bad idea; I may join her), and the Minneapolis police fucked up again.
Yawn.
Just get me through this week, just get me through this week. Can't I even count on the internet to get me through this week?
Thanksgiving is my absolute least favorite holiday of the year, as I usually spend it surrounded by people I barely know. People I've barely known for the last 29 years. I prefer to crawl into a corner and stick my nose in a fashion magazine for the duration. A little trick Steve taught me, actually, except he does it with a tome. Works every time; these people who've known you for three decades are just relieved that they don't have to labor through awkward post-dinner conversation.
"So... what is it you do again? I can never quite understand your job."
"I'm a prostitute, but don't tell Grandma. What do you think of these fingerless gloves?"
It's a bullshit holiday, anyway. How many other countries celebrate genocide with a gorging feast?
Yawn.
Just get me through this week, just get me through this week. Can't I even count on the internet to get me through this week?
Thanksgiving is my absolute least favorite holiday of the year, as I usually spend it surrounded by people I barely know. People I've barely known for the last 29 years. I prefer to crawl into a corner and stick my nose in a fashion magazine for the duration. A little trick Steve taught me, actually, except he does it with a tome. Works every time; these people who've known you for three decades are just relieved that they don't have to labor through awkward post-dinner conversation.
"So... what is it you do again? I can never quite understand your job."
"I'm a prostitute, but don't tell Grandma. What do you think of these fingerless gloves?"
It's a bullshit holiday, anyway. How many other countries celebrate genocide with a gorging feast?
posted by Alexis @ 2:01 AM
4 Comments:
At 11:16 PM,
Dulcinea said…
Too bad you can't just do nothing with me. :-)
At 2:56 AM,
Alexis said…
And too bad you won't just come along with me and make the entire experience that much more tolerable. The invitation remains open.
At 11:30 AM,
Anonymous said…
in my country, we don't celebrate Thanksgiving. also, we don't buy Christmas gifts.. it's pretty awesome..bring the latest issue of Vogue when you go to the dinner: it has 426 pages of pure awesomeness. that should help you survive the post dinner hell.
At 2:25 PM,
Dulcinea said…
Really, Maria? I mean.. hell of a sales pitch you just gave there. I think I'll pass.
Post a Comment
<< Home