Apple Trees

I've been big on analogies lately, and everyone around me seems to be having relationship problems, so let's try this one: A man is an apple tree. After yelling "MAKE ORANGES!" at him for long enough, does he actually start giving you oranges? No, of course not. He can only give apples.

Women grow and change, but men are forever twelve years old. This is the great dichotomy; God's twisted little joke. He will always chew with his mouth open. He will always leave his dirty socks in the bathroom. He will always forget your birthday. No matter how hard you try, you will fail at trying to change him.

So you accept men for what they are. You abstain from elevating your expectations. You abolish the idea of the perfect man. You refuse to set yourself up for failure.

Do you swear off men forever? No, of course not. Eventually, someone will come along with only a handful of tolerable inadequacies. You accept the sum of his parts, because he's nothing greater than that.

For now, you just relax and have fun. There's no need to settle for some fucked up lunatic just so you can turn him into a project. That's nothing more than self-torture (or self-aggrandization, depending on how you look at it).

Cherish thyself.